please don't read this

someone call the boys in white, we got a keeper here

Tuesday, August 23, 2005

1-800-INSOMNIA

JMO was telling me about this house party he had, I'm not sure if it was recently or a long time ago but anyway. So he knows this lady who's supposedly an expert in insomnia and JMO has a boat load of her flyers that he passes around to his neighbours weeks in advance before his parties and makes certain they see it by leaving multiple copies in places like their rose bushes, door mat, windshield, garage door handle etc.
Besides all the regular info, the flyer's tag line(or however you call it) says, "THE first place to look when you cannot sleep"
So when the party was taking place, the inevitable occurred: A neighbour came around complaining about the noise. JMO asked him "why is the noise a problem? What's wrong? You can't sleep?" "Yes, it's noisy and I cannot sleep" Right then JMO pulled out the flyer and said "You saw this, I know you saw this" and showed it to him. "Yes I saw it but-" then JMO pointed to the tag line and asked the neighbour to read it. Out loud. "THE first place to look when you cannot sleep"
"And you understand what it means, right? It's pretty simple" JMO told him
“Yes I understand it but-“
“Well then why didn’t you listen to what it said? Why did come here first instead of calling the number?”
The man was so baffled and stunned by JMO’s ‘logic’ that he didn’t know what to say and I’m certain had a deer in the headlights look.
Apparently the neighbour left but failed to call 1-800-INSOMNIA. Or so the story goes.